Monday, October 19, 2009

Someone Hates Me

Really?  Seriously?



This last weekend I started noticing that the kids were a little congested, but I hoped and prayed that they weren't getting sick.  Well, now here I am five days into recovering from my gall bladder surgery, and now Julia, Raven, and I all have colds.  Sheesh.  I hate to sound like a whiny baby, but seriously, I could use a little break.  I am going back to work next Monday.  I would really like to be healthy by then... like, FEEL good.  Bodily.  My abdomen and my head.  Raven is also supposed to start daycare next week; I don't want her immune system weak upon entering a plethora of germs and I want her to have a good first day.  Furthermore, I don't think I can mentally handle Raven's cold turning into RSV and landing us in the hospital.  At the very least, I would cry.  A lot.

I know that I should be praising God even through the storms, and believe me, I DO know He is good and He is there and that I am blessed.  Julia is a sweetheart of a daughter AND sister... seriously, I couldn't ask for a better daughter in her.  And Raven, God bless her, sleeps and eats so well (and poops really well too... ha!).  My husband is a blessing to me and my family and especially today I am thanking God for him.  I have a job, Adam has a job, we have wonderful and caring family and friends... I could go on and on.  But, even still... it is hard not to be a little angry.  And, I suppose... I can say, I am not THAT sick and Julia is still puttering around the house a million miles and hour and Raven seems to be handling her cold well and it could be A LOT worse... but still, there is that little being inside of me saying, "Why?  Why NOW?"

I prayed about this a lot last night and have been on and off today... mostly, I am praying for peace through all of this no matter what it means.  I am praying for strength to make it through no matter whether we are healthy tomorrow (a miracle!) or end up in the hospital (Please, God, No).  And, I am praying for healing; I'm still recovering from my surgery and while I feel a ton better today than I did last week, I am still really sore and tire very quickly... and a cold on top of it... wow, I just want to curl up in bed and go to sleep (sounds good, but Adam is heading out for the night soon and Julia is a spitfire in the couple of hours before bed).  If you have an extra prayer or two you would send up for our family, it would be appreciated!

Much love,

1 comment:

Mosey03 said...

I know just how you're feeling. I have had a rough month or so with Noah with teething and diarrhea (including lots of interruptions of sleep), and a painful blister for me from nursing him. I have also been feeling like I just need a break, but I too know that God is still good. We prayed for your family tonight. Hope you all feel better soon!

-Shanna Mosey (Bob's wife)